There is a 13-month split and then a 19-month split between my three children. So at one point in time, I had three under three.
At one time, I had three babies under three. If this is you right now, I feel ya, sister. If you are considering this sibling spacing, allow me to give you a glimpse into this world we survived. We just finished potty training my youngest. So as I wash and pack away the diapers I can look back and recall the last two years as a blur and a joy – with some highlights.
The Best Friend
If you are pregnant with your third, or adopting a little one, or have twins along the way, there are many many pieces of advice the general public likes to offer (actually this goes for 1,2, or 12 kids and on all parenting topics). I personally only tuned in when someone would mention that we were in the same club, the three under three club. The most common thing that was mentioned was how hard it was. But in the near future, it would be absolutely wonderful because they have two best friends. I would completely agree with that statement.
Guilt
Guilt is a word I became very familiar with during my last pregnancy. I was overcome with the feeling that I was missing out on all of the fun and developmental stages of my oldest, and my middle child was being overlooked because what she was doing wasn’t the first time and she wasn’t a baby. And then my third showed up and I realized if I paid that attention to my older children then I wasn’t snuggling my baby enough. So one way or another I figure they will all end up in therapy because their mother didn’t hold, watch, play, make eye contact, read, or sleep enough at the beginning. I’m sorry children. Your mother did her best.
Strategy
Just before I had three under three, I recall having a panic attack when thinking about going to the grocery store. How was I going to get through the store without taking down an entire display of canned soup?! More importantly, how was I going to make sure my kids weren’t run over by a car in the parking lot?! That is when I realized I had to develop a strategy for the task that lay before us.
1. Know your store.
In NW OKC there are a few stores that have, what we like to call, Super Carts (two kids ride forward facing at the rear of the cart and still there is room for the rear-facing child in front of them.) A total of three children can be strapped in at any given time. These are Super Target, Neighborhood Walmart, and Sams. Crest has the really cool Car Carts where two children drive the cart in the front and another sits in the traditional seat up top. Still a total of three seatbelts, just a different configuration. Then there are places that have two seats and work well while babywearing. These are Whole Foods, Wal-Mart, Target, and Aldi.
2. Parking.
My mother used to never park by the cart return because she didn’t want her car to get hit. I, however, embraced the buggy corral and have been known to park in the very back of the lot where a lone Cool Cart is left to the elements. I love those spaces and try to not park there if I am by myself. This is how I battled my fear of them running into oncoming traffic. I park, I load, I shop, and I return the cart to the corral.
3. Another trick I learned was to tell my babies to keep one hand on the car.
This was especially helpful when we got back to the car and were loading up.
4. Stay organized.
When the kids were younger, I would keep a set of drawers filled with extra diapers, pull-ups, wipes, and clothes in the back of my van, along with the froggy potty. I am not the best planner, and this helped our outings not end in as many tears or accidents.
Clutter
In my heart, deep deep down in my heart, I wish I was a simple minimalist. I am not. If we have it and I think we will use it again, there isn’t a chance I will be posting it in an online garage sale. That means toys, clothes, furniture, etc. are in our house until we are done having babies. So when you have a 2, 1, and newborn at various stages of development, you have three different levels of toys and books and equipment for their use. Our playroom looked like a mixed-up daycare/bedroom/museum at one point. And we had two of a lot of things because the first two were so close in age. Such is life with three under three.
That is just a glimpse of what it is like when you are in the three under three club, but I left out the biggest secret. After a few months, you forget. You forget that it was a thing until someone reminds you. You love your children the same way you’d love them if they were four years apart. And you love them with all you’ve got and you do the best you can. You are their mom and you get used to your intense routine. Just remember that TV is okay in moderation, Mother’s Day Out can be a lifesaver, double jogging strollers rock, and a cup of coffee in the morning is essential.
*This post was originally written in 2015.
