Being a mama is hard!
We all know that the day in, and day out care of our little people is difficult. They are loud, messy, often uncooperative, and whiney.
But then, so am I in my own adult way.
I change my language and won’t have a meltdown in front of others, of course. I might call my closest girlfriend and share all the details.
I might make a random rant on my social media account.
I might answer the phone with a fake drippy “Hello!” when the phone rings.
I might walk into church smiling even though we fought the whole way to church.
I might do lots of things that all point back to trying to make my bad behavior look better, more socially acceptable.
“I am just venting”
“I am too tired to clean up my mess today”
“I don’t want to do all those things! Who do they think they are to expect me to work so hard?”
“It’s not fair! Why can’t life ever just be easy?”
But the reality is, I behave badly just like a child.
So why, WHY, do I expect my kids to have it all together? Why do I expect them to not make mistakes? Why do I want them born being mini adults who I can’t offer grace to after a failure?
How can I, as a mama, offer GRACE to my children? The answer comes through humility. It comes from admitting that I make mistakes too. I have to share that I do not have it all together and offer forgiveness, just as I am so grateful when my kids forgive me.
Do you, Mama, tell your babies you are sorry? Do you ask them for forgiveness? Do you model grace in their lives?
In my home, the pink plate may just be my forever reminder of humility. We have a simple pink plate that is not much different from the green, blue, or red plastic plates that are stacked in my kitchen cabinet. A plate that is often laid out on the table for a meal. A plate that the children fight over – yes, they fight to NOT have the pink plate! It is a plate that I often hear the complaint, “I don’t want that plate!” They act like using it must change the taste of the food to some disgusting and inedible slop.
This week I got mad! I lost my sanity! I threw the pink plate in the trash! Then as I turned to face the complaining child, she ran from the room sobbing.
My chest got tight… my stomach felt sick… I could see this was more about my reaction than about the awful pink plate. I had to seek my baby out and make it right. I had to restore fellowship with her.
I found my precious daughter face down on the couch, with tears rolling down her cheeks. I sat down and began,
“Mommy was wrong. I should not have thrown the plate away. I will be getting it back out of the trash. Will you forgive me for how I reacted?”
She graciously did offer forgiveness and even held my hand at lunch while she kindly asked me, “Mommy, what is wrong?”
Oh, sweet girl full of intuition, how did you know my reaction was not about a silly pink plate? I had allowed the cares of the world to pile up and the pink plate pushed me over the proverbial cliff of motherhood. My bad behavior had modeled that we can lash out when we don’t like our circumstances. However, I hope my restitution instilled in her that even mamas make bad choices and even mamas must ask others for forgiveness.
I think I will eat off the pink plate from now on as a reminder that my children are always watching.